Dig deep. . .
Rise above. . .
Be present. . .
Cherish the moment. . .
What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger. . .
Get tough or die. ..
This is my self-talk lately. Sounds a little confusing, right? Some days I don’t know how to dig any deeper. Other days I want to rise above but feel like my wings are clipped. I want to cherish the moment but find I’m grieving that I don’t have the anticipation of the future to spur me on. So, I resort to my tough girl talk and tell myself what doesn’t kill me will make me stronger. As a last resort, I hear my mother’s voice saying “Get tough or die.” Yes, her favorite line to me when I was growing up. Why all this conflicting self-talk at a time like this? Or is it really conflicting? Maybe, in fact, it is all in balance?
Eckhart Tolle, a famous spiritual teacher and author, recently made the comment that the future has never been ours. We’ve always assumed it was. We’ve assumed we could make plans to go on a vacation on a certain date. We’ve assumed we could plan a family function on a certain date. We looked ahead at what the upcoming season might bring and traditions or hobbies we enjoy during that time. We, as humans, assume the future is ours. In the back of our minds, we know it could be taken away, or plans could change, but I don’t think any of us have ever fully understood the magnitude of what it would feel like to not have the certainty of the future until now. The future never has been ours and never will be. Fact.
In the past 8 months, we’ve lived this reality. The future is fragile at best. As a result, we’ve turned our time and attention to the present moment, whether we wanted to or not. An exercise some have found difficult. Before COVID, I remember thinking my home had served its purpose. It had been our safe place and gathering place while we raised our 2 children. It had served as a place to entertain when family came to town. It saw kids come and go over the years. It still served as a gathering place over the holidays and for the occasional weekend when everyone was home, but it’s primary purpose was done. And then the stay at home order went out.
Slowly, over the next 8 months, my home became my place of worship, my place of work, my place of calm, and my place of joy, my place of frustration and of grieving. I saw potential and the need for change (i.e. cleaning). It became my place of entertainment and socializing, albeit virtual. It took on a whole new meaning, a whole new purpose. It wasn’t just a structure designed to provide shelter and the occasional social gathering. It became my everything. And so I turned my focus, love, and affection inward to the present. To my home. I now find my home provides so much more for me than 8 months ago.
In yoga, we often talk about coming back to “center.” I feel that is what I have experienced with my home. It has become my center, and I am grateful for that. I have also experienced that with my career as a teacher – I cherish the face to face time I have with my students knowing at any moment it could be taken away and has been due to safety procedures and policies.
Although my home has become my safe place and the place where I can seek deeper meaning and higher purpose, as well as carry on my day-to-day routine and work, it still takes effort to live in the moment and cherish the moment. Hence, it is, after all, all in balance. We dig deep so we can rise above. We are present so we can cherish the moment. We get tough because we know there are those who need us right now and are relying on our strength. The Universe itself may feel out of balance at this moment, but our lives don’t have to be out of balance. Each day is a juggling act to create that balance within so we can feel at harmony with our current situation. That juggling, that pushing and pulling, that tug of war with all our emotions, feelings, and thoughts is so necessary. Difficult at times, yes! But so necessary! So, look for the good in the moment, look for your strength in the struggle, and look for the power of the moment, or the “Power of Now” as Eckhart Tholle refers to it. It’s there. Namaste
